Meant Something To Me

It takes alot for me to express how i feel ,when it comes to men.

because most people weren't Heavy when i was a Kid .

all through school i was afraid to raise my hand

as i didn't wanna seem nerdy so i stayed quiet and sunk into

the chair at the back of the Class wishing i could disappear .

like the Sun on a stormy day.

as i grew into my teen years ,  things didn't change much i had few friends

so i'd stay in my room listening to songs that touched

the deepest part of my Soul and Awakened a spirit in me

that now finds it easier to write what i feel  thanks to a poem

i heard once on the radio back in my teens by a group called

The Moody Blues and the song Nights In  White  Satin's  poem

is all it took for me , to break FREE of the chains that made my Heart feel as cold as a Body with  NO SOUL .

This poem became My Wings to soar places i'd never Dreamed

possible for me .

especially now as an Adult who went through years of being used as

a human punching bag for someone almost 19 years ago 

it still feels like yesterday , being grabbed by the throat 

thrown up against a wall time and time again 

when all you can do is cover your face , because you don't 

want the marks to show there , so you'd rather be hit  in other places. 

it took me 5 years to even come close to trusting people again .

especially men  because if a man approached me to say hi

i'd make sure i was 5 feet away just to get a Good head start at a run .

Then you came along and sang this song that God know's all i could think was  Maybe someday out there i'll Find LOVE  again

and i'll mean to them what i'm trying to tell you , your song

Meant Something To Me , it made me wanna know if chivary

was Dead  or If miracles truly can happen when you least expect it

even when your as Big or Fat to some as I am .

i wanted to tell you as strange as it may sound now , i never meant to insult you asking you to play the song for a Tip .

I just wanted you to know that  it Meant something to me

hearing you sing your song of Cocoaine

Because when a person's NEVER had love and they

find it in something you wrote that made them wish for

Such a feeling of Love

shouldn't it be a Gift to know No matter where  you are in this world

someone is Greatful to you for putting back

the Smile on their Heart and the warmth in their Face

that shows you it meant something to me

and for that You'll Always be LOVED !

written by Celeda's Rein 3-16- 2011  for  singer  Jerrod Niemann